Too many cooks…er, plumbers

It’s a sign of the times.  The economy must be ticking up around here because houses that had previously sat vacant and unfinished are now for sale.  Homes that didn’t exist a few months ago are getting finishing touches.  It’s put builders and painters and electricians and roofers back to work.  And plumbers.

Which leads me to today’s mixed metaphor.  In our scenario, I’m technically the only one who will be doing the cooking of our future babes.  But I need a little help with the recipe, and we’re currently missing a key ingredient.

Also, it turns out, we need a remodel of the whole damned kitchen.  Especially the plumbing.

I saw Dr. C today.  He’s the one who tends to my plumbing and will eventually be the one putting one or more buns in my oven.  Turns out, he also has opinions on Hubby’s plumbing.  Despite the fact that a year and half ago, when we were seeking help from someone other than Dr. K, he was reluctant.  Today, he tells me that he’s actually treated men with Hubby’s condition.  Really?  Where was this information a year and a half ago?!

So now, I’ve become general contractor of our family building project.  Which plumber do I trust?  The one who is the local expert (Dr. K, fertility urologist extraordinaire)?  The one who has years of experience (Hubby’s main man back home, Dr. S)?  Or the one who suddenly has all the answers, despite telling us a while back he wasn’t particularly comfortable handling men’s junk?

I’m so confused and a little frustrated now.  Especially since Dr. C had the nerve to tell me that he doesn’t think the dosage or frequency of injections matter.  What the what?  Then why are we spending 3x what we would be had we stuck to Dr. K’s original game plan?  And he thinks we should go ahead and do an SA now.  Because at $250 a pop, we can so afford to just do an SA whenever we feel like it.  Grrr.

Hubby couldn’t come with me today.  I came home from work and filled him in, and he helped calm me down a little.  He votes we stick to the plan we’re on now, especially since we paid for a year’s worth of office visits with Dr. K up front for a discounted price.  Which means our next SA will be next month.  Which is fine.

Also fine: me, according to Dr. C.  He was very optimistic today, quoting me the clinic’s 75% live birth rate (not pregnancy rate, live birth!) for women my age.  I’m assuming that means under 35.  I’m much closer to that cut-off than I’d like to admit or even think about.  He gave me a full exam, which meant getting up close and way too personal, including another encounter with the trans vag invader.  Shockingly, Dr. C also took a page from Dr. S’s book today, saying it’s possible we could conceive naturally.  People really need to stop telling me this because it will make me crazy.

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8 thoughts on “Too many cooks…er, plumbers

  1. Oh, geez. I’m sorry things have to be so confusing. Sometimes you just don’t know who to trust, especially when you get totally different answers from your doctors. Or even differing answers from the SAME doctor. It may sound paranoid and pessimistic, but I’m starting to trust no one!!

    • It’s terrible. You think doctors know what they’re talking about, but it seems like they just don’t sometimes. I may have to resort to Dr. Google.

  2. As if this whole journey isn’t confusing enough…doctors should stick to the specialty they work in. And this doctor doesn’t seem to understand the emotional implications of getting a SA whenever one pleases…I remember thinking about my husband’s upcoming SAs constantly and having to mentally get myself ready for the results. ugh

  3. This sounds incredibly frustrating. Just like a building project, you really have to keep on doctors and medical professionals to keep your needs front-of-mind — it sounds a little cliche, I guess, but doctors are human, too. Clearly they can forget and/or change their thought processes without relaying that information to the patient! Hang in there. 🙂

  4. You’ve managed to take a very nerve-wracking life event and make it funny! (Which is partly why I love reading your blog.) 🙂 Who knows who to pick?!? After 2 failed IVFs, we went for a second opinion and it seemed like everyone thought we should switch doctors. We thought about it and discussed it with the doc who all but begged us to stay – so we did. Best decision ever! We got extra special care from him after that and… oh, yeah, our positive pregnancy!

  5. Thanks for the supportive comments, everybody. I know this is the one place I can complain and nobody accuses me of whining because you’ve all been there too. I guess I shouldn’t bitch too much. I’m going to need these people (hopefully) very soon!

  6. I really don’t understand why doctors withhold information or change their stories mid-stream. They have your chart with your whole history — if they’re going to say something that contradicts their previous wisdom, they should at least glance at the chart so they can say something like “I know this is different from what I told you before, but X and Y make a difference…” I know that of course doctors are doing the best they can but when things seem to change mid-stream like that it can be so confusing. I hope you’re doing OK.

    • This is exactly my frustration. I don’t even think he had looked at the chart before sitting down with me because the first time I mentioned “my husband’s condition,” I was met with a blank stare. It was only after I explained it that he claimed to have treated men with this condition. Which I found especially odd since the urologist who specializes in fertility issues admitted he hadn’t. I don’t know what’s going on or what to believe. I just wish the professionals would be a little more, I don’t know, professional?

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