Anyone watch Breaking Bad last night?  Don’t worry, I won’t give anything away. Except to say that my husband pointed out, during this episode, that where we are–and I’m just going to assume he meant both our current place of residence and the situation we are in, even though he said only one of those things–is like a huge magnet, holding on tight. It doesn’t want to release us.

I called it a black hole.  But for now, we’ll go with his magnet analogy.

There are lots of magnets in my life.  Babies, for one.  Honestly, I’m not sure if they’re the magnet or if I am.  It could go either way.  I chose a career that’s centered around young children and babies.  That would make them the magnet.  But when I walk into a daycare, random children flock to me as if I were the baby whisperer.  So maybe it’s me.

Also, sugar.  Just about the most powerful magnet there is.

Hubby, of course.  Even when I wanted to stay away from him, I couldn’t.  (That moment lasted all of about four days.)

I had a friend who swore she hated drama, but guess what?  It seemed to follow her everywhere she went.  She was a drama magnet.  And I think she secretly loved it.

Everybody has a magnet.  The thing they’re drawn to, even when they don’t want to be.  Or the thing that sucks them in, against their will.  Sometimes it’s toxic people in our lives.  Sometimes it’s food we know we’re going to regret eating.  Bad habits, addiction, obsessions.  Magnets.

So here we are, in our iron underwear, stuck to a massive magnet that is unemployment, standing still, just waiting for the next thing to happen because we can do nothing (it seems) to set ourselves free and move forward.  All the things that we would like to do–IVF, buying a house, settling somewhere other than here–are just out of reach and apparently made of wood.

The thing is, even the strongest electromagnet has an off switch.  I sure wish we could find ours.

Good or bad, what’s your magnet?  Also–anyone know where the off switch is?


18 thoughts on “Magnets

  1. What a perfect analogy! I think there are too many magnets in my life. Like Starbucks. If I drive by, it pulls me in. And baby and maternity stores at the mall. They call to me and I can’t resist. And the ice cream in the freezer. I just have to have a spoonful every time I walk by. But sadly, the only off-switch I have found is sleep…and even that doesn’t offer complete freedom. I dreamed about a dipped ice cream cone just two nights ago!

    • At least in a dream you can indulge in all the ice cream you want! I tend to have horrible dreams about work–or, last night, Hubby with a gun pointed at his head–it was horrible!

  2. This is a really good question. I think I’m better at identifying things that make me uncomfortable than things I attract. I will give it some thought though.

    As for the off switch…I think it’s hidden in time somewhere. You’ll find it though. Hang in there!

  3. When I was single (and much younger) I knew – as did my friends – that I was a “psycho magnet”! Every weirdo in the world would be magically drawn to me. At one point, I just made a conscious decision to stop and announced to the universe (out loud) that I was giving up the position and would no longer attract those types of people. And it just stopped… kind of like magic!

    I know it’s not always that easy. I’ve also realized that I attract heavy drinkers into my life as romantic partners even though I’m not a big drinker. It’s kind of too late to undo this one, since I’m married to one… but it does certainly make me wonder why I attract them. Hmph.

    • My single (again) sister seems to be a magnet for a certain type of guy. Mostly one who doesn’t have time for her or her 9-year-old daughter. So that sucks.

      Maybe I’ll try shouting at the universe and see if it listens!

  4. A very interesting post that resonates. I’ve always tended towards being a drama-magnet. As of late, if also feels like I’m a “random, weird stuff” magnet too. I think it’s a magnet on top of a magnet.

    Here’s a thought: we tend to feel the pull of magnets most acutely when we try to pull away. So maybe we become most aware of our magnets when we’re transitioning?

  5. Hmmm, interesting. I think my magnet is pregnant women. There were 8 pregnant women at work within the past school year. When friends or coworkers tell me that they are going to start trying and they are worried about it taking too long (which makes me want to smack them), I always say, “You are around me, you will be pregnant in no time.” I haven’t figured out the off switch, I’ll let you know as soon as I know.

  6. Your writing as of late has been amazing. Truly. It’s so honest and in-depth. I am inspired by it. I must confess that running has helped me release a lot of magnets in my life. Meditation and yoga have helped too, as of late. There’s just something about focusing on myself and my strengths that have helped me keep things in perspective and keep those magnets turned off. Of course, throw me in a room with some pregnant women and I can go bat shit in a heart beat. =-)

    • Thank you, dear. I keep telling myself I should run and do yoga and meditate, but I never seem to get around to actually doing it. I think it would help, though.

  7. Bad habits or magnets for me is that I easily get stuck in crappy TV and I just have to see how it goes. I’m trying really hard to let go but it pulls me in and there I sit, when it doesn’t give me anything really. And sugar, so hard to resist the sweet.
    I wish I knew the off switch.. focusing on something else probably.. find a new hobby could also be good. It’s hard to get out of a funk like this. Just waiting for something new to happen is the hardest.

    • Oh, I forgot TV! I’m terrible. I watch way too much of it, but I do try to stay away from trashy reality TV. Most of what I watch is scripted. But at least sitting mindlessly in front of the boob tube distracts me from everything else going on in my life–or not going on, as it happens.

  8. Love this analogy! Plenty of bad vices to pick from, but I guess mine would be sugar/carbs. (ice cream. brownies. ice cream ON brownies….) And while I don’t look it: I love fashion. Getting my hair and nails done. Amazing shoes. But my budget just can’t afford it, so I’ve had to keep a VERY strict distance from those things (If I stay far enough away, the magnetic field can’t suck me in, right?!?!) On the good side; animals, I’ve always loved them. My husband. And as cheesy as it sounds, faith. Even when I left Christianity in high school to explore other things, I always believed there was SOMETHING out there. And it wasn’t because I was scared of some existential-crisis-what-would-my-life-mean-without-something-bigger, it was simply a deep drive to find out WHAT was out there, bigger than me.

    But mostly, it’s ice cream on brownies 😉

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