Snap Back to Reality

After wallowing all weekend, it was back to work today.  Which was just what I needed to kick my own butt out of this funk.

I do better busy.  Period.  On my bad days, if I have time to think, my thoughts inevitably turn dark, and it’s no good for me.  Even doing the work I do–spending my day with families and children, some of whom I would happily snatch up, out of the appalling conditions in which they live–is better for me than sitting at home moping.

So I look forward.  Tomorrow is the hysteroscopy, one step closer to IVF.  I’m somewhat anxious about it, but only to the extent that it interferes with this cycle and my typically-early ovulation.  And let’s face it, if our one-shot IUI didn’t work, there’s little hope this cycle would result in a miracle pregnancy anyway.  But I’m pretty sure I’m about to ovulate.  And I’ve been avoiding baby-making sex because nothing terrifies me more than the thought that a miracle could happen, only to be washed away by tomorrow’s procedure, which includes a saline bath for my ute.

So we’ve been doing other…ahem…recreational activities.  So far, no complaints from Hubby.

This will be a busy week.  Hopefully one that gets my thinking back on track and focused on the goal ahead.  I have to keep reminding myself to do that.  And keep reminding myself.

In other who-knows-what-the-future-holds? news, Hubby was contacted about a job in his home country, but doesn’t have a whole lot of details at this point.  No interview yet, but please keep your fingers crossed.


6 thoughts on “Snap Back to Reality

  1. Good luck on a clear HSG! I like that you’re finding baby-making alternatives to fun with the hubby 😉 I have a lot to catch up on… Sorry to hear the IUI didn’t work out, but you’re still one step closer to having your precious baby! xoxox

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