It’s been an up-and-down day. I’ve got a lot to wrap my brain around, so I’m breaking it down sort-of-bullet-style.
Good: I had two visits this morning and took the rest of the day off, so Hubby and I got to have lunch together before our appointment, and I spent the rest of the afternoon at home.
Bad: I already have a mess to figure out tomorrow. I got a text saying my 1:00 cancelled. I didn’t have a 1:00 scheduled for today, so I need to figure out if my 1:00 for tomorrow thought the appointment was today or really needs to cancel for tomorrow. I know it’s not a big deal, but it’s one more thing I have to do in an already busy day.
Good: I’m glad we spent the money on genetic screening because
Bad: Two of our four embryos were genetically abnormal, including one of the better-graded embryos that would have been transferred if we hadn’t done the screening.
Good: One of them was “normal,” and the other one came out “no signal,” which means we don’t know one way or the other on that one. But those are the two we’ll transfer (assuming they survive the thaw).
Bad: After the transfer, we’ll have nothing left. Dr. C tried to talk us into doing another fresh cycle, saying my response was not great for a 34-year-old, and if this transfer works, I’ll be at least 36 by the time we try another one. But we don’t have the money for another cycle now, and I don’t want to put off this FET any longer.
Good: We got our FET on the calendar.
Bad: I was under the impression that transfer would happen next month (Hubby, too), but it turns out it won’t happen until March.
Good: Hubby made three appointments to freeze some sperm, which means he can soon go back on his beloved testosterone.
Bad: His counts seem to be in decline, nowhere near the all-time high of 850,000/ml (which is still abysmally low).
Good: I came home and made an appointment with a therapist.
Bad: She didn’t come across well over the phone. Maybe she’s not a phone person. I don’t know. I was a nervous wreck talking to her and couldn’t even get out the questions I had written down in front of me. The two other therapists I was going to contact aren’t available. One of them isn’t taking new patients, and the other is out of the office until February 11. I don’t know if the one I scheduled with is going to accommodate my work schedule. Her latest appointment is at 4, except for the one day I could do a 4:00 appointment, when her office is closed.
Good: We have a plan. We have solid dates on the calendar. We have two PHOIs waiting for us.
Bad: This is our only chance for now. I don’t know what we’ll do if it doesn’t work, and it’s making me more anxious than usual. I’ve nearly burst into tears at random several times this afternoon. I couldn’t even tell you why.