I didn’t realize how hard this would be. It never occurred to me that my “cycle buddies” would end up pregnant and I wouldn’t. (And for those of you in the same position as me, I’m sorry. This sucks.) The vast majority of bloggers in my reader are either pregnant or parenting, and I’m still […]
My bracket is busted. Broken beyond repair. Unlike last year, I’m probably going to lose to my husband this time. Admittedly, I didn’t take much time or care in filling out my bracket this year. I actually did it the evening after I woke up in the middle of the night puking, so I wasn’t […]
According to Dr. C, nothing about our failed cycle can be chalked up to poor egg quality or ute problems. He proclaimed that he’s more thorough than most when it comes to checking out the lady bits pre-IVF to ensure he knows what he’s working with. That the only thing he’d do differently is start […]
In the hopeful days, when Hubby was applying for job after job and awaiting deadline after deadline, I used to come home from work and ask him the same question. After months and months of nothing, I eventually stopped asking because the answer was never good. This afternoon, when I came home, Hubby asked, “What […]
My last post satisfied my need to vent all the bad shit that has happened in the last week in addition to the reality that our $20,000+ gamble was a bust. Hubby’s unfortunate choice of words. Being sick. The horrific cramps. But let me be clear. It hasn’t all been doom and gloom around here. […]
As if the emotional pain of a failed cycle wasn’t bad enough, for the past two days I’ve been doubled over in physical pain with the worst. cramps. ever. I’m pretty sure my uterus is trying to eat my other organs. There’s so much I’ve wanted to write about regarding the sucktitude of the past […]
Saturday 6:39 pm I haven’t brushed my teeth today. I’m still in my pajamas. I refuse to leave the house. I haven’t felt this way since my mom died. The same raw, always-on-the-verge-of-tears feeling that set in immediately after hearing the news, even though I was half-expecting it, and didn’t leave for days. In the […]
I’ve stopped sobbing long enough to post this. There will be more sobbing to come, I’m sure. My clinic wants me to stay on my medications and re-test on Monday to confirm the negative. Which just feels like a particularly cruel brand of torture to me, but I guess I have to do it. And […]
It’s been a long week. At some point during their visit, each of my family members, including me, has commented on the simultaneous slow creep and lightning speed of the passing of time. I have been checking blogs after dropping my family back at their motel each evening, and thinking of all of you. Thank […]
It’s Thursday, although it’s felt like a Saturday all day, and I’ve been doing my best to occupy myself while trying to remain in a (mostly) horizontal position. Here’s a little catch-up: ∞ There’s no such thing as TMI on in infertility blog, right? Good, because I finally pooped today! And without all of your […]
Something Out of Nothing 