Feeling Better

Hubby’s dad seems to be feeling better.  His stats prove it.  After two surgeries, plus multiple other procedures, a big chunk of the tumor has been removed, his kidneys are draining via two tubes inserted into each side of his back, and the irrigation of his bladder is resulting in bags of less- and less-red-looking fluid.  He’s still confused, but not to the point of hostility (at least, during the day), amiably accepting each time he is reminded he’s in the hospital and can’t get up to take a shower or that Hubby’s uncle isn’t expecting him for lunch.

We’ve been on rotating “shifts” the past few days, Hubby’s uncle early in the morning, then his brother, then Hubby and me, and finally a nurse the family hired to stay with my father-in-law overnight.  He’s hardly slept, which is probably why nights have been so difficult for him.  He asks when his sons will visit him, calls them in the middle of the night, tries to get out of bed, pulls at tubes and tape and the cannula up his nose.

This is what still worries me.  Hubby extended his visit by four days, hoping that his dad will be released by then, hoping that he can help his dad get re-settled at home before he leaves.  My hope is that, once he’s back in a familiar environment, the confusion will stop lessen considerably.  They are in the process of getting someone to stay with him at least 10 hours a week, just to check on him, take him shopping (that’s a whole ‘nuther story–how he lost his license), make sure he’s keeping up with his daily routines.

I’m leaving tonight.  Without my husband.  I’ll be traveling alone again, but if the last time proved anything, it’s that I’m a big girl and I can handle it.  Still, I hate to leave him with so much uncertainty.  He has to come back in four days, regardless of how his dad is doing.  We can’t extend his stay any further than that.  For one thing, the day he is now set to arrive is the day we’re both to start a round of antibiotics for this upcoming IVF cycle.  For another, I’ll miss him.  And he ‘s already saying how much he’ll miss me.

So, while I leave tonight feeling better about his dad’s physical health improving, there is still so much we just don’t know.  And that includes when we might be able to come back for another visit and/or for good.

I told Hubby the other day–only half-joking–that when he gets back, we need to take another vacation to recover from this one.

7 thoughts on “Feeling Better

  1. Managing all the emotional and logistical aspects of a sick loved one (particularly a sick parent) is very draining and hard. Mainly because you never know what the outcome will be of all of this. Add in the fact that everyone deals with this very differently (just as you stated in your last post) and it can be taxing for all involved. I’m glad Hubby was able to extend his time in his homecountry. And I hope that your FIL’s health continues to improve so that they can bring him home. But I will also state, I completely understand where you were coming from at the end of your last post. I felt the exact same way about my grandfather (I was in the minority compared to the rest of my family).

    Safe travels and thinking of you.

  2. I was just wondering how you guys were doing when the post popped up in my reader. Glad to see there’s improvement. Here’s hoping it’s uphill from here. Have a great flight!

  3. Wow that sounds like an emotional whirlwind of a trip! And I am so sorry to hear about hubby’s dad (I’ve been keeping up with the story, but only was able to comment now). Have a safe trip home and I can’t wait to hear about your upcoming IVF journey.

  4. Glad to hear he’s doing better. I can’t even imagine how difficult all this must be. Wishing you a safe trip home and a speedy recovery for your FIL.

  5. Really glad to hear that there’s an improvement. It sucks that this is how your vacation turned out, though…you really might need a vacation from your vacation.

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