I applied for a job on Monday. Well, that’s not exactly true. I applied more than two weeks ago, but when I sent a follow-up email, discovered that my application had not been received. Cue mild panic attack followed by an entire afternoon and evening of frantically re-applying, using an application form I didn’t even […]
*Pregnancy, pregnancy, pregnancy, pregnancy, blah, blah, blah. You’ve been warned.* I am so excited to have four straight days to relax and try to recover some energy this weekend. When I originally proposed this idea to Hubby, he wanted to drive to a neighboring state to visit a national park, but after seeing how exhausted […]
I’ve been trying to write this post since yesterday. I don’t even know where to begin, and I’m having a hard time getting my thoughts in order. I guess, with that opening, I should start by saying everything appears to be fine. No impending doom to report. Try telling that to my continued anxiety. At […]
*Whiny, angsty, pregnancy-related post ahead. Read at your own discretion.* Hubby asked me last week if, since I’m now pregnant, I was going to stop going to therapy. Because being pregnant is the cure to my crazy? Ha! During yesterday’s session, I was going on and on and getting myself all worked up over the […]
Hubby has an interview scheduled for Monday. It will be his third such interview for an academic job since April. (And his first since the heartbreaking “My academic career is over” comment.) It’s for a one-year position on the opposite side of the country. As he tends to do, Hubby is already thinking about how […]
Stupid. Effing. Hope. I let her get her claws into me. I believed Dr. C when he said we’d have “more eggs” this time around. I let Hubby’s infectious optimism and his unfounded musings (“Maybe we’ll get 20 eggs. No, 25!”) get to me. And in the end, I was disappointed. I should have shut […]
So, that thing I was hinting could happen in this post? Apparently has happened. My 76-year-old father has been laid off. And, as I feared, Zappa has had to help him pick up the pieces. She assisted him with his online unemployment application yesterday, and then called me to commiserate. Unless a miracle happens, no […]
And so it begins. Again. We have a plan. Right now, it’s only a plan, as we still have no money, but it’s better than floundering without one. I called Dr. C’s office today. I let him know that we were hoping to go to Hubby’s home country for a couple of weeks and come […]
Y’all are way too kind. The comments on my last post were totally undeserved. It’s not courage that led me to pick up the phone and grit my teeth through a stilted conversation with my former friend. It’s my spineless fear of confrontation. But it’s coming. I feel like it has to. If she’s going […]
Three years ago today, Zappa called to tell me Mom was dead. Three years. And we’re still no closer to having the baby she always wanted for us. Her death and our infertility are forever intertwined, each influencing my feelings about the other. Besides missing my mom, this day is just another reminder of time […]
Something Out of Nothing 